There Is No Conflict Between What You Want & What The World Wants

There is a conversation in my men’s circles around speaking your truth without shame or blame and asking for what you want.  I believe there is an innate desire in men to take care of the people around us, in our families, in our work, in our relationships and all around us.  We become care takers to the people that mean the most to us by being generous with our love, our money and all of our resources before we consider what it is that we want and actually put our desires out there as we are generously offering our love and assistance to others.

Ask for what you wantWhat then happens when we don’t speak our truth, our desires and what it is that we actually want for our own lives?  There are lots of possibilities…one possibility is that we stray from the people who mean the most to us because we get afraid of speaking our truth.  Fear kicks in and tells us we will never be able to get what we want even if we ask for it because of how past history played out.  Shame could kick in and tell us that what we want is so far out of the ordinary that the only response from others will be rejection.  We might look for our desires and needs to be met elsewhere in secrecy and in betrayal to the others whom trust us the most because we want to avoid the difficult task and facing into the mystery of what might happen after we speak our truth.

I stand in my own difficulty of speaking my truth and asking for what I want at times.  Especially in the face of losing BIG love…I honor the difficulty of stepping up to the plate to speak my truth.  If I speak my truth will you still be there for me or will you shame me for what I want?  Will you take on my truth as a criticism of yourself and get defensive, leaving me feeling unheard?  Will I be left alone and abandoned?  Will I continue to fear the potential damage which could result from living my life the way I want to by speaking my truth and what I want?  Will I continue to allow fear to rule the roost?

I will re-commit over and over again to speak my truth, without shame or blame, because what I want for myself and what the world wants…there is no conflict.  The only conflict is the story I create in my own mind which keeps me separated from the world and feeling alone…which keeps me from becoming the man I want to become…which keeps me from expressing and receiving the love that I already know is out there in me and for me.